Lloyd Cadena’s father, Jun “Khalid” Cadena, has spoken up on his vlogger son’s death, describing it as the “saddest day” of his life.
The YouTube star died at the age of 26 on Friday, as announced by his family on his official Facebook page. No other details, including cause of death, were released.
In an emotional video message via his own YouTube channel, Jun who is an OFW working in UAE shared how hard it is to accept his son’s death and to not be around in his final moments.
“I lost my son Lloyd Cafe Cadena. I was shocked when I was on duty, my daughter in Dubai calling me around 9 a.m. And she told me, ‘Papa, wala na si Lloyd,’” he began, then breaking down in tears.
“Napakasakit, ayaw kong tanggapin. Mabait na anak. Hindi man lang kami nagkita muli. Anak, patawad hindi na kita nakita muli. Oh Lord, Allah, forgive all the sins of my son Lloyd and the entire sins of our family. Alam ko na sa Inyo na siya.
“Ang hirap tanggapin ng isang ama na mawalan ng anak. Super hirap ang dinanas ko sa aking mga anak. Ginapang namin sila, ng kanilang ina, mula nung maliit pa sila sa hirap…
“Oh Lord, Allah, give me more strength.”
Jun recalled feeling so weak when his eldest child, who is based in Dubai, relayed the tragic news to him.
“Talagang nagulat ako na hindi ko maintindihan nga maybe two to three minutes or more, tulala ako. Naka-duty kasi ako sa planta.
“Kaya pala parang tumatayo iyong balahibo ko nung tumawag ang anak ko. Iba, parang may something sa paligid. Hagulgol ang anak ko. Talagang iyak nang iyak, parang mama niya pag nag iyak eh.”
Jun also expressed his sadness that Lloyd didn’t get to fulfill all his dreams.
“Sayang iyong batang ‘yon, batang-bata pa. Hindi pa niya natupad yung mga pangarap niya. Dami pang pangarap sa yun.”
When Jun tested positive for COVID-19 in June, he remembered asking Lloyd to look after his siblings and their mother because him being a senior already, he wasn’t sure if he could make it.
“Yun lang ang bilin ko sa anak ko na huwag pabayaan yung mga kapatid mo… tapos, siempre yung mama nila,” he said.
He then appealed to the public to no longer inquire about Lloyd’s cause of death, reiterating the family’s earlier request for privacy.
“Mga kabayan, huwag na kayo magtanong kung anong dahilan ng pagkamatay ni Lloyd. Manood na lang kayo ng YouTube, mga news. Igalang niyo na lang yung privacy naming pamilya.
“Ang vlog na ito ay gusto ko lang iparating sa mga kamag-anakan ko na I miss Lloyd Cafe Cadena. I miss him too much. Talagang na-miss ko siya. Hindi ko na siya makita uli, umuwi man ako…”
He regretted not being able to come home because his passport is not with him as his work visa is being renewed.
“Nanghina ako eh. Hindi ako nakakain kagabi. Ngayon lang ako kumain umaga. Ayaw kong buksan yung aking messenger. Magbukas ako Internet, puro balita tungkol kay Lloyd. Tumutulo luha ko eh.
“Ang sakit, napakasakit talaga,” he said.
He looked back on how Lloyd always asked him to retire from his job and return to the Philippines for good. One time when he couldn’t fly home, Lloyd brought the family instead to him in UAE.
“Yung words niya na, ‘Papa, ayaw mong umuwi, kami na lang pupunta diyan.’ Yung nagpunta siya dito sa UAE, doon kami nagkita-kita sa anak ko sa Dubai, 2016 pa yata yun.”
“Mahilig tumabi sa akin yun eh. ‘Papa, hindi ka kasi umuwi, kami na lang pumunta rito.’ ‘Paano ako uuwi? Yung pamasahe ko kasi, ipunin ko na lang. Maliit lang naman sweldo ko’… So, natuwa ako doon sa binanggit niya na sama-sama talaga kaming lahat. Mga kapatid niya at saka yung mga apo ko sa Dubai.”
Father and son last saw each other in August 2019 when the former came home for an operation.
Lloyd’s family is familiar to his followers because he would feature them in his main and second YouTube channels, which have since accumulated over eight million subscribers combined.
Such was his online clout that family members would set up their own vlogs and attract hundreds of thousands of subscribers.
While Lloyd was known for his funny antics and laughtrip-inducing vlogs, he would grow emotional in the presence of his father, thankful for his sacrifices and for accepting his being gay.
Meanwhile, the last conversation Jun had with his son was on the day before he died. Lloyd asked his father for prayers. Jun responded to Lloyd that he always prayed first for his children, five times a day, as he is Muslim.
“Yun nga ang message niya sa akin, ipag-pray ko raw siya, tapos ang daming heart heart heart. Pero madaling araw ng Friday, hindi na siya nag-reply sa akin. So, nag-miss you na lang ako, ingat siya ganun at saka sundin din yung payo ng doktor, kung anuman.
“Eksakto talaga, nine o’clock, gulat ako, tumawag iyong anak ko, humahagulgol. ‘Ano nangyari sa ‘yo?’ ‘Pa wala na si Lloyd.’ Nagulat talaga ako, nanghina ako. Iba pala kapag… Di ko alam, para kang ano…. Parang may pumalo sa akin na nanginig yung tuhod ko, ‘tapos tumatayo balahibo ko. Parang may something sa paligid.
“Kinausap ko na lang, ‘Lloyd, kung andito ka sa tabi ko, ingatan mo na lang ako. Kung anuman, sama na lang ako sa ‘yo. Dapat nga kung puwede nga lang ipalit iyong buhay ko sa ‘yo, ako nalang.’ Matanda na ako, aanhin ko pa yung buhay ko kung malungkot naman yung mga anak ko.
“Tama na yung naranasan kong kasiyahan sa edad ko na ito. Masaya na ako, makita ko lang masaya kayong mga anak ko, okay na sa akin.”
He shared that he seemed to have seen a vision of Lloyd at his workplace, in his usual sitting position when he was editing his vlogs.
Jun ended his video with a message to his son. “Lloyd, kung saan ka man ngayon, nawa’y masaya ka na kasama ni Allah. Nawa’y gabayan mo kami ng iyong mama, mga kapatid, na makayanan namin ang mga pagsubok sa buhay. Nawa’y maka-move on kami.”
He thanked his son for making the public, his family and him, most especially, happy.
“Salamat anak sa mga kabutihan na iyong binigay sa amin, sa iyong mga kapatid, mga kapitbahay, mga barkada, sa iyong mga followers, viewers, subscribers, napasaya mo sila.
“Maging ako, masaya ako anak. Bago ako matulog, pagdating ko galing trabaho, pinapanood ko mga vlogs mo. Kahit lumang-luma mong vlogs, pinapanood ko kasi iba ang dating ko pag nakita kita na ngumiti, na masaya.”
Watch the full video here:
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