Former TV personality Jude Bacalso has addressed the viral incident at a Cebu restaurant where she was accused of berating and making a waiter stand for two hours for misgendering her and addressing her as “sir”.
The incident occurred last Sunday, July 21, at a restaurant in a Cebu City mall, identified as Ulli’s Streets of Asia.
According to a widely circulated post made by a Facebook user, a food server allegedly addressed Bacalso as “sir,” leading to a supposed confrontation.
The post also claimed that Bacalso forced the server to stand for two hours and refused to accept the server’s apology.
Following the incident, the restaurant released its official statement confirming that they had met with the server and their team to offer support and guidance on handling such incidents.
“Rest assured that we are educating our people and placing their welfare of utmost priority,” the statement also read. “Discrimination has no place in our restaurant.”
Jude also responded to these allegations in a now-deleted social media post, calling the incident a “series of errors” and refuting several details.
“Yes, I was addressed as ‘sir.’ No, I did not scream or shout at the wait staff who did. Did the staff stand there for hours? Yes, we were waiting to resolve it with the owners. Did I demand that he stand there as punishment? No,” she clarified in her post.
In a separate post published on her Facebook page, Jude recounted her meeting with the restaurant management, a crew member, and the store supervisor. The waiter in question, however, was not present during the meeting.
She expressed her satisfaction with the outcome of the discussion, emphasizing the agreement to implement more inclusive practices within the establishment.
“After each one of us aired our sides, I am happy to share that we have agreed to pursue together more inclusive practices in the restaurant,” she stated.
Reflecting on the incident, Jude acknowledged the intensity of her reaction and expressed regret for the lack of kindness in her approach.
“I also realized that in the impassioned pursuit of my advocacy, I could have done with a little measure of kindness, sadly quite absent in the ruckus this has all unnecessarily created when it was made public without our knowledge,” she reflected.
She offered a public apology to the staff involved and the patrons who witnessed the incident, seeking to foster a path toward reconciliation.
“I made a personal apology to the group present, and requested if I may do so for the concerned waiter. I am also making it very public with this post, as it has become quite public fodder,” she continued.
She also praised the restaurant management for their “constant communication” with her and their employees, highlighting their family-like treatment of the staff.
“To quote the supervisor, they served me as best they could even if it was most difficult for them to do so,” she relayed.
She clarified that she did not demand the waiter stand throughout the discussion, noted that he chose to do so while they awaited input from the management.
“I would like also to reiterate that I did not demand that the waiter stand for the whole length of time, as I was explaining my side of the gender sensitivity issue,” Jude explained.
“It was he who chose to stand in front of me as we waited for input from management, who I attempted to contact.”
In closing, she also extended her apologies to the entire restaurant staff and the customers who were affected by the incident. She acknowledged her mistakes and expressed hope for a collective journey toward healing and understanding.
“My apologies also to the rest of the staff who are disheartened by the way things have escalated, as well as to the customers present at that time. This is a huge chunk of humble pie that I must ingest, because I have erred.
“May we start here with, as the supervisor pointed out, an uphill path to reconciliation and we hope you will be able to allow us and yourselves to do so unhampered so we may all learn and heal from this,” she concluded.
It is worth noting that Cebu City is recognized as one of the pioneering local government units in the Philippines to pass an anti-discrimination ordinance.
